Bigger Bear Series: Love, Like Driftwood

One of the perks of working for a multinational company is the chance to go on business trips.  These trips give me a chance to more affordably visit family (and friends) from various parts of the world. Most recently, I stopped by my cousin's in LA.  I was hoping for a quick Grand Canyon trip, but there are more important things than checking off bucket lists - like catching up on the past 10 million years of our lives and rekindling my childhood faith in storybook romances.

My realizations:

• The weekend was grossly insufficient for all the catching up we need to do.  I definitely have to go back.
• I grew up worshiping the ground my cousin walked on.  She was, to me, the epitome of class and sophistication. Several years later, she has maintained that air of sophisticated grace while going about daily ordinary tasks.
• As a child, I thought to myself, "when I grow up, I would want to be just like her". Fast forward to today and "sophisticated" is the last word anyone would think to describe me. BUT, I realized, that what drew me to her was the fact that we are alike in so many ways:  OC (wanting everything to be perfect), strict sense of decorum, respect for authority, strong but submissive, big on maintaining composure at all times, perpetually in a dilemma between expressing love and holding back for fear of spoiling the beloved. (Yes, we are both highly complex individuals - perhaps a little crazy in the head, too).

But my most important takeaways from the weekend revolve around the love within her beautiful family:

• The family that prays together, stays together. They do!  And they're rock solid.
• Love conquers everything ... even 3 completely different individuals.  My cousin, her husband and their daughter couldn't be more eclectic.  But they mesh really well, like fruit cocktail. Thanks to the amazing syrup, called Love. (Yeah, I agree, cheesy analogy)
• For every man is a woman who is his True North.  Through the years (and girlfriends), my cousin-in-law found himself compelled to: (1) check in on my cousin time and again; (2) keep her as benchmark against whom every girl had to measure up to; (3) admit to himself (and, to some extent, his ex-girlfriends) that he simply cannot reciprocate their affections because his heart remained bound to her. And, so, he put a ring on it (my cousin's finger, in case that wasn't obvious).
• The rest are affirmations of last month's reflections (I Am LoveSick):

1. Every now and then we need some breathing room.  Sometimes the other room works; sometimes it needs to be farther.  Sometimes counting to five is enough, sometimes it needs a much longer time.  
2. Timing is crucial.  If your life stages are not in sync, it will be like fitting a square peg into a round hole.  Don't force anything now.  When the time is right for both of you, it will be as if stars aligning.  
3. Life is a ball.  When a partner decides to move on to the next partner, don't skip that beat.  Dance with your next partner.  Just keep dancing.  Sometimes you circle back into each other's arms.  Sometimes you stumble into the arms of the one, who will want to walk with you through the gardens for the rest of the evening.

A toast from a Hallmark movie, "Surprised By Love", summarizes it perfectly:

" ... the tide may have taken you here or there, but true love - like driftwood - reinvents itself and stands the test of time.  To Love, may it always find its way."

I was so moved by what I witnessed over the weekend, that these words just came tumbling through my head as I watched the sunset during my flight ...

In solitude

My heart calls for you

And you come

In whispers, yes,

But you come

Always

Although

Never enough

Each time I am left

Wanting

Craving always

More

Let it end!

Must it end?