I was finally able to watch "Becoming Jane", after almost a year in my hard drive (thanks, Robin!). And, I realized, I am becoming Jane.
In the movie, having found out about Mr. Weasley's marriage proposal to Jane, Tom Lefroy asks her, "How can you dispose of yourself without affection?" She replies, "How can I dispose myself with it? You're leaving tomorrow."
She hang on to her ideals, I suppose. Not finding, or unable to marry, the love of her life, she never married.
"I can see that you cannot bring yourself to marry without affection ... nor with it. I respect you for that and share your opinion ... neither can I. I'd always hoped to win your love in time. But I am vain enough to want to be loved myself rather than my money." (Mr. Weasley)
Whether reading her novels have molded me into becoming Jane; or we are merely very similar to begin with, that I could perfectly relate with her characters, I realized, Jane and her novels may very well have doomed me to a life of spinsterhood.
Looking at it more closely, while "Pride & Prejudice" is every woman's childhood fairytale (Oh, Mr. Darcy!), "Sense & Sensibility" hits closer to home. I find myself to be a mixture of Elinor and Marianne Dashwood - oftentimes sensible with painfully calculated displays of emotion, while passionately (perhaps even childishly) believing in the magic of "true love" that lasts forever.
In terms of Mr. Right, doesn't every woman, at one point, want the kind of passionate love Mr. Willoughby offers? The kind of love that knows immediately, with certainty, and plunges recklessly head-on, in full-throttle. Sadly, it is also, often, the kind that proves unsustainable, running out of gas too soon. After the initial high, it sputters to a grinding halt once reality sets in.
Then we realize, that what we truly need is the sensible, devoted kind of love that Colonel Brandon offers. The kind of love that is founded on a true understanding of and respect for the other person. It steadily and quietly grows, unrushed, without prodding - sometimes, in secret; until it reveals itself, deliberately and firmly. By then, there is no question about it. Love becomes a decision one makes with a peaceful, joyful and (fully-justified) hopeful heart.
"Sometimes affection is a shy flower that takes time to blossom." (Mr. Weasley)
If only we have the luxury of Time. And, yet, Time is bendable ... and expandable. Who has not experienced forever in a heartbeat? Time, afterall, is what you make of it and who you spend it with.
In the movie, having found out about Mr. Weasley's marriage proposal to Jane, Tom Lefroy asks her, "How can you dispose of yourself without affection?" She replies, "How can I dispose myself with it? You're leaving tomorrow."
She hang on to her ideals, I suppose. Not finding, or unable to marry, the love of her life, she never married.
"I can see that you cannot bring yourself to marry without affection ... nor with it. I respect you for that and share your opinion ... neither can I. I'd always hoped to win your love in time. But I am vain enough to want to be loved myself rather than my money." (Mr. Weasley)
Whether reading her novels have molded me into becoming Jane; or we are merely very similar to begin with, that I could perfectly relate with her characters, I realized, Jane and her novels may very well have doomed me to a life of spinsterhood.
Looking at it more closely, while "Pride & Prejudice" is every woman's childhood fairytale (Oh, Mr. Darcy!), "Sense & Sensibility" hits closer to home. I find myself to be a mixture of Elinor and Marianne Dashwood - oftentimes sensible with painfully calculated displays of emotion, while passionately (perhaps even childishly) believing in the magic of "true love" that lasts forever.
In terms of Mr. Right, doesn't every woman, at one point, want the kind of passionate love Mr. Willoughby offers? The kind of love that knows immediately, with certainty, and plunges recklessly head-on, in full-throttle. Sadly, it is also, often, the kind that proves unsustainable, running out of gas too soon. After the initial high, it sputters to a grinding halt once reality sets in.
Then we realize, that what we truly need is the sensible, devoted kind of love that Colonel Brandon offers. The kind of love that is founded on a true understanding of and respect for the other person. It steadily and quietly grows, unrushed, without prodding - sometimes, in secret; until it reveals itself, deliberately and firmly. By then, there is no question about it. Love becomes a decision one makes with a peaceful, joyful and (fully-justified) hopeful heart.
"Sometimes affection is a shy flower that takes time to blossom." (Mr. Weasley)
If only we have the luxury of Time. And, yet, Time is bendable ... and expandable. Who has not experienced forever in a heartbeat? Time, afterall, is what you make of it and who you spend it with.
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