I am part of a global project, Compass, and, boy, has it lived up to its name! (I have not traveled this much since Global Internal Audit). Between the travels, actual work, family, homeschool and social life, I barely have time to breathe; much less, write.
So, tonight is a rare opportunity and I'm grabbing it (though I'm bound to be rusty).
Last month's Compass trip seemed to revolve around one theme: Direction (I'm not kidding). Some are timely reminders of forgotten lessons; some are new lessons that strengthen the old.
"Dead Men Tell No Tales"
During the flight to the US, I watched "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales". It was about the lifelong quest of two individuals (a boy and a girl, of course) for their fathers. At the heart of it was a compass that pointed towards one's greatest desire / treasure.
Here are what I picked up from the movie:
- Jack woke up in a drunken haze, not knowing where he was nor what he was doing. A person with no direction is essentially dead. The same can be said of a person with any form of addiction.
- "I'm not looking for trouble!"; "What a horrible way to live". To truly live means taking risks and making mistakes. Fear paralyzes and leads to a slow, regret-filled death.
- "Look at me, son. Leave me now before it's too late"; "I won't. I'll never stop. And if you throw me over, I'll come straight back". Do not give up on people you love who seem to have lost their way or don't want to be found. God never loses hope nor should you.
- "Maybe you should retire to the countryside."; "I'm a pirate. Always will be! So how do I save what be mine?" Be true. Do not settle. Do not compromise who you truly are.
- Jack traded his compass for a bottle of rum. Sometimes, while chasing after a false need, we lose what matters most.
- Capt. Barbossa did not realize Carina was his daughter until he checked the compass. Always check your compass. Sometimes what we seek is right in front of us (cannot be more cliche; cannot be more true).
- "I know which stars to follow home". We do. Sometimes we just don't follow them.
"Know your stars. Stay (or get back) on course"
At our head office, there was a women's symposium which took place on my final day. I was unable to attend. But my manager gave me a very good debrief, particularly on one speaker's talk, which (lo and behold!) used stars in the analogies.
As it turns out, it is not uncommon for "successful" women to feel unhappy. (I'm sure the same is true for men). We typically get thrown into this crazy race for "success" that society defines and mandates. Trouble is, in this race, there is a huge tendency to either (1) feel inadequate when we fail; or (2) feel empty or lost when we succeed. This is because, in most cases, these women are successful by society's terms, not their own.
We need to know, maybe even define, our own stars to guide our course. We have to define our own measures for success, based on what is truly important to us; our values and principles; our passions. And, from among these stars, pick out our True North, upon which all major decisions will be hinged.
Once we have defined our stars, then it will be easier to navigate through the tugs and pulls of the world or society. This does not mean we will always be on course. No. It will always be a balance of passion and practicality. Sometimes we will find ourselves off course, but, once we know our True North, it should be easier to get back on course ... and feel right about it.
"You think there's nothing out there for you, but there is. You just can't see it"
On the flight back to Manila, I watched "Water for Elephants". There were no star analogies, but it touched on complacency, a trap we all have fallen into at some point.
There are situations that serve us only for a moment, then we should move on. Sometimes, however, we tend to overstay in a situation even when it no longer serves us; sometimes, to the point when it is already harmful for us. We stay because we have grown accustomed to it, that we fail to see the situation for what it truly is. We stay because we are afraid of what is out there, afraid that what is out there could be worse --- and it may be true.
But is this where you should be? Is this all you could ever be?
"It's gotta be now"
Then, when we do figure out that this is not where we should be, we take another 10 million years overthinking our next steps, endlessly planning when and how to go.
Sometimes, when that moment comes, we just have to jump. There are better chances to get back on course while you are overboard than on a ship sailing towards the wrong direction.
