Reflection on Readings / Bigger Bear Series: The Skies Will Break For You

1st Reading - May 28, Saturday
Jude 17, 20-25
"21 Keep yourselves in the love of God and wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ that leads to eternal life."

Last Saturday, as I was driving home from an errand, Corinne Bailey Rae's "The Skies Will Break" came on and it gave me a start ... because "the skies ARE breaking" for me now.

Before I go into the details of my "breaking skies" ...

***
In April, I received a note (a mere two-liner) from a friend, written on top of a long (oh, just a couple of pages) email I had sent 4 years ago. It detailed my sentiments and my woes at that time --- which was EXACTLY my sentiments and my woes currently.  Reading it felt like a virtual ASL ice bucket challenge.  I was stunned.  And then I was distressed and panicky.  It's been four years (FOUR YEARS!) and ... either I haven't moved or I've been going in circles.  Whichever conclusion I chose, it meant the same thing:  I was a failure.

I was in quite a state when I told my sister about it.  To which her only reply was something like, "But, Ate, I believe in God's timing ha". That silenced me.  I believe in God's timing and I've been telling people to do the same.  Yet here I was, panicking and running around like a headless chicken.  Shame on me!

Then my shepherd in the community posted an interview of Oprah ... and it was spot-on.  Below are the points that hit home:
The Legend of Oprah

1. "There are no mistakes ... There's no such thing as Failure.  Failure is just that thing trying to move you in another direction."
2. "You have a supreme destiny ... There is a supreme moment of destiny calling on your life ... and your job is to feel that, to hear that, to know that."
3. "You come from something greater and bigger and we all are really the same."
4. "... it's all leading to the same path.  There are no wrong paths"
5. "You get as much from your losses as you do from your victories."
6. "RELAX"
7. "When you're not at ease with yourself, that is the cue that you need to be moving in another direction."
8. "Get still"
9. "Think about the next right move and, from that space, make the next right move and the next right move."
10. "You are not defined by one moment or circumstance or what other people define as failure."

It was complemented by another post I saw from Ascension Press on "3 Things to Know About the Sign of the Cross", particularly the 3rd point.
Ascension Press - The Sign of the Cross

1. God is a Trinity
2. Your Worth 
3. You're here for a reason:  To know God, To love God, To serve God in this life so as to be with Him in the next.

I realized:

1. There are lessons that we need to consciously remind ourselves of over and over again, like God's perfect timing.  Just because, at the end of a trial, I see how everything eventually fell into place in God's perfect time, doesn't mean I will not panic whenever things don't happen the way I think they should. (Slow learner here).  
2. A lot of the gifts of the Holy Spirit are consumable and need to be replenished time and again, like Faith and Patience.  Just because I managed to go through a difficult trial in faith doesn't mean I can go through the next one in faith without any trouble.

It's a daily thing ... and the struggle is real (insert Bitmoji here).

***

Now, going back to my "breaking skies" ...

Prior to the song coming on, I was mulling over the recent events in my life.  In  just a span of two months (from the time I received the note):

1. I went on a business trip I didn't intend to go to ... and it landed me the next role I wanted.
2. After months of working on the requirements, I finally got the loan for the lot I was purchasing ... just in time for the completion of the building plans.
3. My sister  is resigning from her steady income job to get her sh@t together ... and offered to help me get my sh@t together as well.
4. I felt unhealthy and wanted to do some form of cleansing program.  My bestfriend offered me one ... and, in the process, gave me something that will help augment my expenses.
5. My friend's meeting got cancelled, so he decided to drop by for a quick catch-up over coffee.  We ended up tossing around great ideas for my DIP (dream-in-progress).

I realized, there was never any need for worry. Help will come when it is needed.

What I should have done (and should always remind myself to do) was to "keep myself in the love of God", while I "wait for His mercy". The God who has set my life in motion will make sure I roll towards and land on the right spot, the one reserved just for me.

So, yes, the "skies are breaking" for me now ... and it's right on time.

The Skies Will Break by Corinne Bailey Rae